I have been busy building, trying, note the word trying to kick the procrastination and get off my butt and DO the things I have been planning to do....I am studying (Tibetan language and Buddhist philosophy) which for the record is incredibly enriching and fulfilling and I highly recommend getting out and learning something new today. Stretching your mind can be like blowing out the cobwebs from an old and dusty cupboard, rediscovering and reconnecting to a part of your brain that have neglected. For me, it is challenging but fun. I am loving learning for the first time in my life - well except for my yoga teacher training which felt more like experiencing that study per se.
But back to here and now and what is filling my days. I am busy building my own work, my own website and own material. It brings up every insecurity I have in terms of "making it" and being successful, of putting out there what I know and maybe exposing what I don't. Exciting and scary are in bed together on this one. They are joined at the hip. For every moment there is a small sense of achievement there is a moment of "what AM I doing???" So hence the procrastination, it is easy to not do rather than do and fail. Why try when it may not work anyway. Why take a risk when it is safer and easier to not. Safe is comfortable, but safe I have found in the past is boring. Safe is for the "that would be nice" sayers, safe is for the "success is for other people" musers. But safe is not for the explorers, the adventurers, the change makers. I am sure Steve Jobs did not sit at home saying, "it would be better if I just took a job working for someone else's dreams." No, Steve Jobs followed his own dreams.
So maybe I am no Steve Jobs, but I am trying to do what I know is the right path for me. The path that is not often walked, that is not often understood by others, and is not always filled with comfort and ease (or a regular pay check for that matter) So I am practicing what I preach, I am stepping again outside that comfort zone, most days it I snap right back to the comfort and ease of not doing, but I am not a quitter and I will slowly but surely get there. SO, this blog will be less and less and more and more will be www.fleurcarter.com - still a blog, but maybe less about me personally but more about what I am doing. I hope you continue to follow my on the journey as one world morphs into the next.
But back to here and now and what is filling my days. I am busy building my own work, my own website and own material. It brings up every insecurity I have in terms of "making it" and being successful, of putting out there what I know and maybe exposing what I don't. Exciting and scary are in bed together on this one. They are joined at the hip. For every moment there is a small sense of achievement there is a moment of "what AM I doing???" So hence the procrastination, it is easy to not do rather than do and fail. Why try when it may not work anyway. Why take a risk when it is safer and easier to not. Safe is comfortable, but safe I have found in the past is boring. Safe is for the "that would be nice" sayers, safe is for the "success is for other people" musers. But safe is not for the explorers, the adventurers, the change makers. I am sure Steve Jobs did not sit at home saying, "it would be better if I just took a job working for someone else's dreams." No, Steve Jobs followed his own dreams.
So maybe I am no Steve Jobs, but I am trying to do what I know is the right path for me. The path that is not often walked, that is not often understood by others, and is not always filled with comfort and ease (or a regular pay check for that matter) So I am practicing what I preach, I am stepping again outside that comfort zone, most days it I snap right back to the comfort and ease of not doing, but I am not a quitter and I will slowly but surely get there. SO, this blog will be less and less and more and more will be www.fleurcarter.com - still a blog, but maybe less about me personally but more about what I am doing. I hope you continue to follow my on the journey as one world morphs into the next.
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