Again I sit here not really sure about what I will write. But I know if I persist just a little the words will come. They begin to dance across the page as my fingers tap away at the keyboard, forming sentences, telling stories that I am not really sure where they will go. It is being open to the moment I guess, and embracing what ever comes to mind. Dealing with it as it arises, in this very minute rather than a carefully laid out plan. It is my tendency to plan, to map out in my mind how things will look, what I want to say, do, write, be. I spend a lot of time in my head seeing it all. It can be incredibly empowering process as I often can visualise a scenario or event, something that I want to bring into my life, and more often than not it can and does happen. Pretty cool stuff really (see Careful What you Wish For) but it can also be tiresome.
The past few days I have been consumed by my creative mind in overdrive about the future, the possibilities, the potential. It is exciting and invigorating, and for once I don't feel wrapped up in the stories of "I can't because of a,b,c" or my other favourite "It won't possibly work because x,y,z". It is a pleasant change I must say, but man it is tiring. I find it hard to come out of, so meditations have been highjacked by business plans or marketing strategies and asana practice by target markets and workshop ideas - even in a massage last night my mind insisted on working like a little mouse on the wheel.....going, and going and going.
It wasn't until savasana (final resting pose) this morning in a beautiful class from Anna (all of our classes are beautiful as we each take it in turn of teaching) that I finally found some reprieve. My body sunk into the bliss of rest, the deep sense of release and letting go that my mind decided to follow suit. It too took a breather and had a mini break. It didn't get dusty and dull, it didn't get side tracked and excited, it just sat with my breath in the beauty of that deep rest. Bliss. I know it may be different in meditation tomorrow, it may not. I know I can't attach to the feeling of rest I had in those gracious 5 minutes, but I can at least take some peace away from the practice and enjoy the pleasure of deep relaxation.
As I get closer to home, I am trying my hardest to stay in the beautiful Yoga Coach bubble, to stay with the moments here and not get caught in the excitement of it all. With the excitement is still elements of fear and nerves, what will I talk about with friends back home, how have I changed, how have they changed, what will people think of me etc etc etc. I plan to stay in Australia for a couple of months but will I be back in India when I plan to be, will that happen, will I change my mind, and the big one, how will I feel being back in Australia?!? I don't know, and all of these are projections onto the future are not particularly useful. So staying here and now, soaking up the bubble and the amazing group we have is about where I am at. And creative business mind, you can pipe down til next week, I don't need to have a 5 year plan today.
The past few days I have been consumed by my creative mind in overdrive about the future, the possibilities, the potential. It is exciting and invigorating, and for once I don't feel wrapped up in the stories of "I can't because of a,b,c" or my other favourite "It won't possibly work because x,y,z". It is a pleasant change I must say, but man it is tiring. I find it hard to come out of, so meditations have been highjacked by business plans or marketing strategies and asana practice by target markets and workshop ideas - even in a massage last night my mind insisted on working like a little mouse on the wheel.....going, and going and going.
It wasn't until savasana (final resting pose) this morning in a beautiful class from Anna (all of our classes are beautiful as we each take it in turn of teaching) that I finally found some reprieve. My body sunk into the bliss of rest, the deep sense of release and letting go that my mind decided to follow suit. It too took a breather and had a mini break. It didn't get dusty and dull, it didn't get side tracked and excited, it just sat with my breath in the beauty of that deep rest. Bliss. I know it may be different in meditation tomorrow, it may not. I know I can't attach to the feeling of rest I had in those gracious 5 minutes, but I can at least take some peace away from the practice and enjoy the pleasure of deep relaxation.
As I get closer to home, I am trying my hardest to stay in the beautiful Yoga Coach bubble, to stay with the moments here and not get caught in the excitement of it all. With the excitement is still elements of fear and nerves, what will I talk about with friends back home, how have I changed, how have they changed, what will people think of me etc etc etc. I plan to stay in Australia for a couple of months but will I be back in India when I plan to be, will that happen, will I change my mind, and the big one, how will I feel being back in Australia?!? I don't know, and all of these are projections onto the future are not particularly useful. So staying here and now, soaking up the bubble and the amazing group we have is about where I am at. And creative business mind, you can pipe down til next week, I don't need to have a 5 year plan today.
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